How do we find our Life Purpose?


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How can We find our Life Purpose?

Life can be hard, it can bring great sorrow and It is ok to acknowledge that, but we actually came to earth to experience joy. 

After my hubby died people told me to imagine a better life, and I laughed, I said, I had the better life I would imagine and now it is gone. 

But I knew I had been left here for a reason, I just needed to find it. I didn’t feel strong or believe I could make a difference, but bit by bit, I found moments of happiness and occasionally joy. No matter what has brought you to this place of searching for more from life, there is help available.

Initially, the things that brought most happiness and joy to my life were when I was playing my grand babies and with the puppy I brought. 

They have brought so much fun and happiness to my life. But I didn’t feel they were my reason for being here, so I kept searching.

So everytime I felt happy I wrote down what it is I was doing when I felt that happiness, this is important as often those moments are fleeting and if you are going through grief, at first they are often far apart.

Then when I am feeling low or stuck I look at the list and even if I don’t feel like it start to do one of those things and it does help. Happiness attracts happiness, joy attracts joy. 

One of the first things I did was sit down and think, ok what are some of the things I wanted to do when I was younger and I didn’t do, and then I decided to do some of them. 

One for me was learn to ride a motorbike, so I now have my motorbike license. It wasn’t easy and at times I wanted to give up, but I said no, this is something I wanted and I proved to myself that I can do it. I also brought my puppy and am learning French. All of these helped but I still felt I was just treading water.

Then I stumbled upon Roz Place and her courses on Angels on Udemy and as I started these my world opened up. I found where I have the most joy and that was in helping others and when I am in the presence of the Devine, when I am using my abilities to help others and so that is what I am doing and I feel that life is suddenly beautiful again, even without my man. 

We had been married 25yrs and I loved him with a passion. He passed away 15 months ago. So I encourage you don’t give up.

I feel excited when I wake up in the morning, I look forward to the day. Yes there are still times when I feel lonely or down but I have learnt that we are strong enough to recognise and hold the opposites in life, creation and destruction, life and death, joy and sadness. One does not exist without the other. When we accept this and know that we are never alone, our Angels and Source are always with us waiting to help, our life gets better. You don’t have to do it by yourself, but you do have to ask. 

The Angels cannot help us until we ask them, so I would encourage you to spend time getting to know your Angels, we each have a Guardian angel that is always with us, and ask for their help. Archangel Michael is the leader of the Archangels, so if you don’t know who to ask then ask him to send the angel you need. Ask Source to make himself/herself real to you and they will. Angels take our messages to Source and then do what Source tells them to do.

Why do I say “Source”, why not Divine or God?

The “God” or “Divine” I know is a huge energy source that is pure unconditional love, in my sons words, “Love, light Man.” 

So that is who I am referring to. If I say God or Divine a lot of people associate that with religion and the theology that that particular religion subscribes to. 

I believe that the God or Source that I know transcend every religion and loves us with unconditional love and is just waiting for us to ask him for help and to be part of our lives and he will be, forever. 

The God I know also tells me never to judge, so I do not judge anyone’s beliefs, and however you know God or Source that is fine. We like to label everything when often we just need to experience it. 

My aim in sharing is to know that none of us need to be alone, we are loved and there is help available if we will just ask.

If you have any questions about this, feel free to email me at seeingwithlight@gmail.com 

My World Fell Apart


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It’s been a while since I posted, the reason is that my world fell apart.

On the 1st March, my beautiful husband of 25 years passed away. We had been told in Oct that he had Leukemia and would have 2-5 years. So when he only had 5 months we were very unprepared.

Fortunatly for him it was a blood clot to the lung that took him out and it was very quick, he was joking with the nurses and an hour later he was dead. He had been very unwell for 2 days.

We were blessed with the the fact that we both realised on the last day that his time was running out, so got to say our goodbyes in the afternoon and I was able to be with him when he passed. I will always treasure this great gift that was given to me.

So as you can imagine it has been a hard time of adjustment and trying to find my feet in a world that looks the same to everyone else but feels so strange and unfamiliar to me.

I realised something yesterday, so thought I would share it with you.

When you love someone and are with them for may years, you see the beauty in them, not the ravages of age.

With Colin I was beautiful and loved, he didn’t see me as fatter or older, he just saw me as the woman he loved and adored and through his eyes I saw myself like this too.

I saw Colin as the beautiful, handsome man he was, I always saw him as handsome and young, he was my love.

He asked how I could still see him as handsome as the ravages of illness took their toll, but I told him I truly did see him as gorgeous and handsome. I saw the twinkle in his eye, the way his face lit up when he smiled at me.

Those twinkling eyes, those looks of love are gone, yet I remain, beautiful no more, the mirror on the bathroom wall reflecting back at me the ravages of age and time.

When you lose the one you love you also lose a part of who you were. I was part of a couple, I was Colin’s wife.

Who am I know?

Julia, who is she without that beautiful, loving, caring man beside her?

I look in the mirror and see the harsh realities of life. Who is this stranger looking back at me? Where did she come from?

When Colin died he took who I was with him as well, he took away the beautiful reflection of how he saw me and left me looking at the hard cold reality of what I see in the bathroom mirror.

Years ago when my Grandfather, died I felt I had lost the only person in the world who appreciated me for being me and once again I am left in this lonely place of feeling that while people do love and appreciate me, that I am all alone.

My daily challenge is to find the joy among the sorrows and most days I have been able to do that, occasionally it seems like there are none, but if I reach out, and this is so hard when you are so lost, then there are people waiting to help and I am reminded that there is still joy in this strange unfamiliar new world.

So many people treat you different or become awkward with you that it is hard to find your way, I am so lucky that one person, probably the most unlikely person, has been there and been a real friend, just coming around to spend an evening chatting or going to somewhere new with me so I am not too frightened to go alone. I know at times he has felt uncomfortable and not known how to react to my changeable moods and constant questioning of myself, but he has let me know it is okay, he is there as a friend.

Having someone treat me as a genuine person, being honest with me and wanting nothing but friendship is a rare and wonderful gift, a true joy among the sorrows.

This person has coped flack for being there for me as people have questioned his motives and yet we have been able to be open and talk even about this. (I am not his type and he doesn’t see me like that).

I am telling you this here so that if you are ever in the position to be there for someone in a time of grief, be honest, be open, talk about the hard questions and what others are saying. So much of life seems unfamiliar, strange and scary that being a real friend and being open and honest is the greatest gift you can give someone.

Having lost so much over the last 6 mths, from all our possessions, our house, my husband, total unconditional love and acceptance here on earth as well as having a home invasion, then 4 mths later my house being broken into again and my car being broken into and ransacked, I feel that even my sense of security has been threatened so to know that someone is there when I need them is so impotant.

As I have dared to reach out I have found many people who are there for me in many different ways, but at the end of the day everyone has their own lives, which are going along pretty much as they always have been. So I need to find a new way to be, a new life, new interests, friends who don’t have partners and kids that fill their life so they have little or no time for themselves, let alone anyone else.

I value and appreciate all my friends and am so fortunate and grateful that they have been there for me and I know they will continue to be, but I also have to find out who this new me is and how to find happiness, joy and purpose without my wonderful man by my side.

So let’s begin this journey of discovery together and see where we end up……

I want to start the journey with two images, one I created just after Colin died and one more recently.

Death

The pain of losing someone while in love https://artboja.com/art/s6w7af/

Baby steps

Learning to live again

 

Finding Joy


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Often when things are going well it is easy to find joy in life, but what about in the tough times.

There is a Buddhist saying that there are 10,000 sorrows and 10,000 joys in life, unfortunately they are often intermingled.

So how can we find joy in tough times?

This will be different for everyone, but the universal thing will be “being in the moment”

This means seeing what is right here, right now. Right now the only moment for you is the one that you are reading this post. If we can find a few moments in a day just for us, whether it be to breathe, to stretch, to have a cuppa and look at a garden or walk along the shore of the ocean or a river or through a lovely forest.

I hear you saying, “you don’t understand, I just don’t have time”

I do understand as I have said the same thing, take heart, you can do it, just in s lot smaller ways.

Most of us have a phone that can be used as a camera, if you do, wherever you are sitting right now, turn on the camera and look around you, look at the details that are on your desk, take a photo of a pattern, it might be the back of the computer tower, the side of a hard disk, the logo on a mouse, as you start to look for patterns and textures you will begin to see them, spend a few minutes taking photos of any you find.

Did you notice that for the moment you were looking for patterns and taking quick photos that you weren’t thinking about anything else?

This is where you will find joy. You never need to show the photos to anyone or even keep them, the camera is just a tool to put us in the moment. If you are outside, see what bugs you can find or photograph colors, flowers, tires, it can be anything. Take time each day to do this and you will notice your stress levels begin to reduce.

Spending time in nature is great therapy so if you can get outside to do the exercise that is great, but even indoors it helps. These are a few of the photos I took while sitting on the beach the other day.

Brown Pacific Gull

I’m watching you

pacific Gull looking up

Pacific Gull, whats up there

 

Where can I find Joy?


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I went to post Christmas cards and get scripts and the Chemist lady asked if I was okay as I was so befuddled, I said, “no, not really” …I told her what was happening in our lives, about the house burning down and my husband being diagnosed with terminal cancer, she was so good, she just came and gave me a hug and said oh, you poor thing, she had tears in her eyes, she was with me in that moment, not trying to fix me or jolly me up or tell me it’ll be okay, she just stayed with me in that moment.

I had a cry, wandered around the shops in a daze and then I saw a little one about to climb on a gopher, his Mum said, “Oh no ” as she raced to stop him and he just looked at her in bewilderment and said, “ride”. To him it was a ride, something to play on, it brought a smile to my face and the next instant I could hear that voice in my head saying, “how can you smile, Colin is going through so much and you are smiling?”

I went to walk away feeling miserable again and then I remembered that to increase joy or good feelings you need to really feel them, allow yourself to really feel them, relive the moment a few times so it is imbedded in your neural circuits so I turned back and smiled at the child and let that moment of joy wash over me. I took a few moments to really take it in and then I continued on my way.

No it didn’t change the situation, but it did make me more able to cope with it. So often we worry about what other people may think if they catch us in that moment of joy, like she’s fine, look at her. But we need to let go of our perception of what others think, that is their thoughts and their lives, all we can do is live our life and deal with our thoughts.

Today I read a devotion in which Jesus said, “I am your joy” this floored me. I was looking for God, other people, things, to give me joy, but I didn’t need to get it from someone or something, as I already have it within me, each and every one of us does.

God lives within me and you and we are one with him, so the joy is already within us. Instead of looking out for joy we need to look in, not to ourselves, but to him who lives within each if us.

What a lightbulb moment.

Sometimes the external needs to be stripped away before we truly appreciate what is within and what cannot be taken away. Most people who know me know I am not religious and don’t subscribe to any religion, however, I have always had a strong faith and belief in God, Jesus is the one who has carried me through so much of the road I have travelled and he is my best friend. Without his friendship and love this life would have been unbearable.

When I talk about God within us, I am not talking about the God of religion, but about a God who is love and has compassion and mercy. I know many people would disagree with me on this and that is fine, that is their journey, but for me God has shown himself time and time again as someone who is there for me, who loves me and accepts me just as I am. He doesn’t just love me, he is Love.

queen-of-sheeba-Southern-copy

This flower that was created to open only for a few days and yet is so beautifully and intricately made was put here to remind us of the beauty that is within each of us, the joy is already within me.

So if you see me or someone else who is going through hard times or grieving and you see them smiling or happy, don’t judge them, instead realize you are seeing the joy that lives within everyone of us and we can tap into that at any time. Sometimes our view is obscured by worry or tears, but the joy is still there deep within us.

i read a beautiful saying, it says, “May you have enough clouds in your life to make a beautiful sunset” I can tell you my sunset is going to be spectacular!!!

I will add a link here to a great little skit on empathy, if you have ever wondered what to say, or do, when someone is going through a hard time, then have a quick look at this. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=1Evwgu369Jw