Pain is my constant companion, albeit an unwelcome one. It invades my being and dictates my life. It is happy when it is in control and when it’s not it strikes out hard and fast.
I find that with my photography I am able to ignore it for a little while as I become totally absorbed in what I am doing, totally involved in the beauty and majesty of nature, but then as if in revenge for being ignored it uncoils like a snake and strikes with fangs that send pain shooting through my body and then it’s poison spreads until I am laid low for days on end and then as if satisfied that it is no longer being ignored and that I know it is in control it is happy to slink off into the corner, never going away, but making sure I stay within it’s bounds, resting often, only doing little bits at a time, living a restricted and frustrated life, then it is happy and allows me to go along with just enough pain to remind me not to become too involved or too enthusiastic about life.
One day I believe the pain will be gone, this is my hope, the thing that keeps me going. I stay within its bounds while exploring every avenue to rid myself of it. I have tried accapuncture, chiropractors, meditation, reiki, cortisone injections, wearing a brace, palates, physiotherapy, Jo-ray, Osteotherapy, cranium therapy, quantum physics (SCIO machine) as well as taking all manner of natural tablets and everything the doctors are able to give me. Some things help and make life more bearable, some cause painful reactions which reduce me to tears and wrack my body with more pain, but as long as I can draw breathe I will not stop trying.
I have been to psychologist and psychiatrists, I do EFT (tapping), exercise and gentle walking as much as possible & try to include time at the beach in every day. I visit a cranium therapist every month and this keeps me believing that one day I will be pain free. I have a friend who gives me free Jo-ray every week when I am at home, the only time I am totally pain free is in the last few minutes of my Jo-ray and cranium therapy treatments I also go on an SCIO machine which has been a godsend, it helps me to stay sane.
I have found that just to place my feet in the water and look at the vastness of God’s creation gives me hope and solace. One day, somehow, some-way I will be pain free!!!